A Dead Duck

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she lay her
pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird’s
chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his head sadly and said, “I’m so
sorry, your pet has passed away.”

The distressed owner wailed, “Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure. The duck is dead,” he replied.

“How can you be so sure”, she protested. “I mean, you haven’t done any
testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something.”

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a
few moments later with a pair of Labrador Retrievers. As the duck’s owner
looked on in amazement, the dogs stood on their hind legs, put their front
paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. They
then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook their heads. The vet patted
the dogs, took them out of the room and returned a few moments later with a
beautiful cat. The cat jumped up on the table and also sniffed the bird
from its beak to its tail and back again. The cat sat back on its haunches,
shook its head, meowed softly, jumped down and strolled out of the room.
The vet looked at the woman and said, “I’m sorry, but as I said, this is
most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck.”

Then the vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and
produced a bill, which he handed to the woman. The duck’s owner, still
in shock, took the bill. “$150!” she cried. “$150 just to tell me my duck
is dead?!!”

The vet shrugged. “I’m sorry. If you’d taken my word for it, the bill
would have been $20. But what with the Lab Reports and the Cat Scan, it all
adds up.”

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Tags: vet veterinarian dog duck death cat

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