The Drunken Driver

So a cop is driving out for dinner when he finds a vehichle in the parking lot with no lincense plates. As he walks over to write a ticket, he notices a druken-looking man inside the car. He wakes him up and asks him, “Where do you think your going without any license plates?”
The driver struggles to reply, “Uh, you-nyu-nyou know, like-de-like, out.”
Cop: “License and identification please…”
The drunk handed him a beer-stained ID, looked him right in the eye and said, “I swear to grawd I’m not drunk.”
Cop: “Buddy, how many drinks have you had today?”
Drunk: “First of all, I’m notcha’ buddy, pal…”
The cop tried again. “Have you been drinking?!?”
Drunk: “Well to be prefuctly honest ocufirr, I’ve eaten like, wiiiine, and a beer or ten.”
Cop: Son, I’m going to need you to get out of the car.
Drunk: “WHAT, YOU DON’T BELIEVE ME?!?”

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Tags: Free Joke Hilarious drunk

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